My Stay at Home Group Therapy

I heard Paul Gilmartin (Dinner & a Movie, Comedy Central Presents) on Girl on Guy: Episode 129 and Nerdist Podcast: Episode 298 in 2014.  I had watched him be so funny while wathcing movies on cable tv and to hear his story and find out what was going on behind the scenes made me understand his poems a lot better.  I have written a blog about his podcast on my other blog, you can find a link below.  I have recently started seeing a counselor again and I am journaling.  I have that many times about finding a support group of some kind but everything in town doesn't appeal to me. In the interm I listen to Mental Illness Happy Hour.  I can go through the archive if I want to hear something about a comedian I knew in the earlier episodes or a regular person with a specific issue they discuss.  Each episode I listen to opens up some little thing inside me.  Hearing how other people have lived, hearing their stories; helps me know that I am a work in progress but I am okay.  I don't know if this will help you.  I would ask my mental health professional about their opinion first.  If you don't have a mental health professional but feel you might need one, that is a wonderful idea, do it. 

http://stuffidorkoutover.blogspot.com/2014/10/mental-illness-happy-hour.html





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I Don't Like "Game of Thrones"

Not the books, not the show.  I am just not a fan.  I watched the first season and it just was not fast enough or interesting enough.  I tried to listen to the first book but it was so slow.  I love George R. R. Martin, in all his interviews I have seen or heard he seems like a pretty neat guy.  The books remind me of a series called "Wheel of Time" which I also couldn't get through because it is just so slow.  I am sorry if I offend anyone who is a fan, but the rest of the series is very low on my to watch list.

Couldn't Make it Through

I write a lot about TV and movies.  I don't make it through some of them. Usually due to the contempt I already had for it or I am just not part of that particular status quo. Here is a short list that I have compiled including why I believe I can't get through them.

Salem - I think the reason I can't get through this is because I would rather watch a documentary on the subject matter. The melodrama was a little too much even with the cutie Shane West trying his best.

American Horror Story: Asylum - I have given this a try twice.  Once when it was on FX and again on Netflix.  The only reason I got through the first season is because I could binge it. I was not into it.  I love the actors but everything else was eh.

Star Trek - I know that as a huge fan of Next Gen and Voyager that saying I can't watch the original series or Deep Space Nine is near sacrilege.  I haven't even tried to watch Enterprise. I also watched but never stop making fun of the original 4 movies.

The Dead Zone (Series) - I made it through four seasons before I couldn't take the sub plots and I stopped watching it.  I did really like the first few seasons both it got really out there.

Borat - I tried watching this twice. The first time I made it twenty minutes in and the second time I made it to halfway through.  I have a very low tolerance for what I call dumb comedy and this is one of the dumbest things I have ever seen.  It was so bad I never watch his other movies or series.

Gender Roles Can Suck It - Part two

I never know how to describe myself to people.  I didn't get it until I realized how much I was bullied.  I think that is where a lot of my problems came from.  I never felt I fit. And goodness I tried to be them or what they wanted me to be.  I was slapped, gum was put in my hair, my bra strap was snapped, I had panic attacks and no one noticed they just thought I was emotional.  I was then teased for my bladder control, weight, crying, and I liked hanging out with boys more than girls.  I tried to hang out with other girls. I liked to try gymnastics moves and for a second thought about trying out for the cheerleaders in Catholic school; until I was told by a girl who would definitely get a spot that the uniform wouldn't fit me.  I eventually just figured out that any chick worth hanging out with is worth dealing with their entourage. I did eventually make a few female friends that I am still in contact with.(1) I did find a very best friend that I will have for the rest of my life when I was 16.(2)



(1) Maybe I should host a game night. Gives me an added bonus to finish cleaning for spring.
(2) I fought hard for that title. (best friend)

I Watched Some Out There Stuff When I was Younger

I grew up with cable and one of my favorite things to watch was Nick at Nite.  It had shows that I loved but no one in my age range had heard of them none the less seen them.  A few of them were black and white. Most of the older shows are now of some of the streaming services.
The Adventures of Superman
Dragnet
F Troop
Welcome Back Kotter
Alfred Hitchcock Presents
The Dick Van Dyke Show
The Mary Tyler Moore Show
M*A*S*H
The Carol Burnett Show
Taxi
I Love Lucy
Green Acres
Mister Ed
Mork & Mindy
The A Team
Lassie

I am sure there are a few more but they escape me at the moment.  I drove my sister crazy since we shared a tv in our bedroom.  When my parents would let us pick out movies I would usually chose a stand up comedy or something scary.  Then when Comedy Central came a long she was just plain screwed.  With the 80s stand up comedy boom I had tons of stuff to watch. Comedy Central gave me some great shows.
Exit 57
Kids in the Hall
Whose Line is it Anyway
And so many specials.

I am not surprised that I have always felt different.  I have learned as an adult thanks to the internet and now podcasts that I was not the only one.  Most of these shows and specials can be found online.

I am officially a stalker but a super cute one

Very recently my (kinda) sister had a precious baby boy. He was having problems breathing so he is in the NICU.  A day after he was born I was sent a link, username, and password to see him almost anytime via webcam.  I logged in and was so happy to see him. He is so precious, tiny, and hooked to so many things.  I quit watching but I have found myself logging in to check on him every time I pick up my tablet.  They have a screenshot feature and I have some great shots of him with his mom and dad during visitation.  I also have one of my sister snubbing her nose, wiggling her fingers, and sticking out her tongue.  I have to say until he is home where I can snuggle and spoil him I will be his stalker.

Gender Roles can Suck It!

There is no such thing as boy and girl colors, toys, or activities.

The only real difference between boys and girls is genitalia and that is able to be changed.

 

What brings this up is; I have discussed in an earlier blog my kiddo loves My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic.  He recently did really good at school and won a prize. I got him an Apple Jacks plush so he had one to play ponies with his cousin.  The poor guy can't play with other boys because he is super strong and hurts kids.  He hangs out with girls quite well.  I encourage this because everyone needs a friend.  He me last night if he could take Apple Jacks in his bag like he had been Mickey.  I told him yes but if you do please remember kids will probably say mean things to you.  You don’t listen, you are an amazing kid who I love dearly.  They are mean because they don’t know you and are maybe too young to understand.  There is no such thing as boy or girl stuff.  It’s all just stuff, if it makes you happy then that is good. 

I think that if you are a parent that it shouldn’t matter to you if your boy wants a doll or a pink toy.  It shouldn’t matter if your girl wants an action figure or blue toy.  If it makes them happy, why make them feel bad about their choice.  I am offering to sign Johnny up for football in the summer, if he were to choose dance or gymnastics, which would be fine as well.  If my niece wants to play football with him that would be really cool but again it is her choice.  My point is don’t push gender roles on your children.  They are who they are and you love them regardless.  Coming from someone who struggled with this all my life, it hurt me a lot being told no because “It’s for boys”.